“Books That If You Had More Than One Life You Would Certainly Also Read But Unfortunately Your Days Are Numbered”

I was reading The Atlantic’s great list of great lists that have appeared in books and this one by Italo Calvino in particular caught my eye. I haven’t read If on a winter’s night a traveler, though my brother did and I know he didn’t like it. I don’t know, Brian, based on this excerpt alone, the book must be awesome!

So, then, you noticed in a newspaper that If on a winter’s night a traveler had appeared, the new book by Italo Calvino, who hadn’t published for several years. You went to the bookshop and bought the volume. Good for you.

In the shop window you have promptly identified the cover with the title you were looking for. Following this visual trail, you have forced your way through the shop past the thick barricade of Books You Haven’t Read, which were frowning at you from the tables and shelves, trying to cow you. But you know you must never allow yourself to be awed, that among them there extend for acres and acres the Books You Needn’t Read, the Books Made For Purposes Other Than Reading, Books Read Even Before You Open Them Since They Belong To The Category Of Books Read Before Being Written. And thus you pass the outer girdle of ramparts, but then you are attacked by the infantry of the Books That If You Had More Than One Life You Would Certainly Also Read But Unfortunately Your Days Are Numbered. With a rapid maneuver you bypass them and move into the phalanxes of the Books You Mean To Read But There Are Others You Must Read First, the Books Too Expensive Now And You’ll Wait Till They’re Remaindered, the Books ditto When They Come Out In Paperback, Books You Can Borrow From Somebody, Books That Everybody’s Read So It’s As If You Had Read Them, Too. Eluding these assaults, you come up beneath the towers of the fortress, where other troops are holding out:

the Books You’ve Been Planning To Read For Ages,
the Books You’ve Been Hunting For Years Without Success,
the Books Dealing With Something You’re Working On At The Moment,
the Books You Want To Own So They’ll Be Handy Just In Case,
the Books You Could Put Aside Maybe To Read This Summer,
the Books You Need To Go With Other Books On Your Shelves,
the Books That Fill You With Sudden, Inexplicable Curiosity, Not Easily Justified.

(and so on.)

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2 thoughts on ““Books That If You Had More Than One Life You Would Certainly Also Read But Unfortunately Your Days Are Numbered”

  1. God, I could not stand that book. Need I point out that that except is in second person? Except not really, because the book STARTS in second person and diverges into a pointlessly “second person” character who’s got his own shit going on, and is beyond flat I don’t know I don’t even.

    That is the second or third most-gimmicky book I’ve every read. Look at me I’m a clever writer doing EXPERIMENTAL THINGS with my modern fiction. SO META. I want to shoot myself.

    • I’ve only read 2 of his books and I definitely vastly preferred “Castle of Crossed Destinies.” Still gimmicky (the characters can’t speak for some reason, so they try to tell their stories via tarot cards), but at least it didn’t pretend to be missing chunks of itself, or whatever, like IOAWNAT did. I think if I’d had to read it for class instead of just for lols, I would have wanted to shred it.

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